1-9

Today, I went to workout all by myself! I woke up extremely early today (think 0430) for education at work and to work an incentive shift. Then, instead of going home and taking a nap, I went to workout all by myself! That is what feels important today. I want to write about it so it becomes real and I can recognize that personal achievement and step (that feels like leap because social anxiety) towards personal growth. Even if it is just writing to some blog that I made so I could have my thoughts in one place. It feels like it needs to be recorded, mostly so that I can’t diminish the evidence of it over time. I have a tendency to talk down about my achievements to myself, but today I felt inspired to write about what is important today.

I also fixed two minor things on my car, which was also good. I did all of this before noon! It makes the day feel so wide open and full of possibility, albeit I am using it to rest to prepare for working three twelves in a row. I’m also proud of myself for carrying the inspiration to write to the act of doing so. It is becoming more natural, just like it once was.

There’s something really freeing about expressing oneself into the abyss. There is freedom in the way that it has nothing to say back. Just a brief and anonymous articulation.

Speaking of, the midwest is supposed to get this crazy polar vortex thing next week. That happens to be where I live and it’s supposed to be perfectly clear in the sky. Sunny, even. It is supposed to fall to negative two below zero! I feel like clear days are so rare in the winter time. I would absolutely love to catch the sunset that day.

I would love to see the warm colors juxtaposed by the bitter, biting cold.

I’ll keep you updated.