Every Last Word
"Samantha McAllister looks just like the rest of the popular girls in her junior class. But hidden beneath the straightened hair and expertly applied makeup is a secret that her friends would never understand: Sam has Purely-Obsessional OCD and is consumed by a stream of dark thoughts and worries that she can't turn off"
"Second guessing every move, thought, and word makes daily life a struggle, and it doesn't help that her lifelong friends will turn toxic at the first sign of a wrong outfit, wrong lunch, or wrong crush. Yet Sam knows she'd be truly crazy to leave the protection of the most popular girls in school. So when Sam meets Caroline, she has to keep her new friend with a refreshing sense of humor and no style a secret, right up there with Sam's weekly visits to her psychiatrist.
Caroline introduces Sam to the Poet's Corner, a hidden room and a tight-knit group of misifts who have been ignored by the school at large. Sam is drawn to them immediately, especially a guitar-playing guy with a talent for verse, and starts to discover a whole new side of herself. Slowly, she begins to feel more 'normal' than she ever has as part of the popular crowd . . . until she finds a new reason to question her sanity and all she holds dear."
Every Last Word by Tamara Ireland Stone took hold of me immediately. I remember searching the shelves of the bookstore, looking for a specific book but being drawn to this one. After reading the above synopsis, I was hooked. I knew that I, as a poet myself, wanted so desperately to know about Sam's experiences and her relationship with writing.
From then on, I couldn't put it down until I had finished it.
Novels like this remind me why I love coming-of-age tales, especially those that take place during the teen formative years. They remind me that growing into oneself is a universal experience as I find myself relating to a character who is marginally younger than me. Confusion and revelation exist in tandem throughout the human experience, of which this novel delightfully reminds me.
I found myself rooting for Sam; grieving with her, loving with her, and relating to her experiences with writing. Poetry can often be regarded as borderline taboo or ridiculous, and I felt the very same safety that she felt when she found the Poet's Corner. I felt myself longing for such a sacred place where writing is honored and valid; no matter the subject.
The normalization of wavering mental health status really sealed the deal for me. As Sam grew into accepting herself and eventually opening herself up to people that truly, genuinely accepted her . . . her relief was palpable. The support system (that had been nonexistent prior) that took root around her moved me. This novel is one of grief, forgiveness, and acceptance. I will surely not forget it.